When Opportunity Knocked. . .

When opportunity knocked I was upstairs taking a shower. Subsequently, I'm still poor as a church mouse, but I'm clean as a whistle.

When opportunity knocked I pretended I wasn't home. I thought it was Jehovah's Witnesses.

When opportunity knocked I answered immediately. Unfortunately, the package was for next door.

When opportunity knocked I was in bed with a hangover. I dragged myself downstairs and answered the door, but it didn't work out. It's one thing to miss an opportunity, it's quite another to throw up on its shoes.

When opportunity knocked I never heard a thing. The fucker came to my old address.

When opportunity knocked I was taking my car in for a tune up. The mechanic said I just needed to use a higher octane gasoline.